Over 80 percent of American adults gamble on a yearly basis, and three to five gamblers out of every hundred struggles with a gambling problem (source). Gambling addictions are traumatic, painful, and soul-destroying – not only for those experiencing them, but also their families and friends. Here Ashley shares her gambling story.
- How To Quit Gambling Addiction
- How To Beat Gambling Addiction
- How To Beat A Gambling Addiction
- How To Beat Gambling Addiction
This post is part of My Sweet Home Life's Overcomers series – where we look at women whose lives haven't turned out quite how they expected.
Gambling addiction is a type of impulse-control disorder — and it's completely treatable. People who look upon themselves as sick have a built-in excuse: 'It's not my fault. I can't help it.' Ditch that assumption right now. It won't do you any good, and will probably derail your efforts to overcome your gambling addiction. 5 Ways To Overcome A Gambling Addiction. 2014-03-03T14:38:48Z The letter F. It indicates the ability to send an email. An image of a chain link. It symobilizes a.
We feature women who have struggled with abuse, addictions, unexpected loss, and challenging circumstances. Golden lady casino review.
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Then you'll want this freebie.Plan ahead to avoid boredom. Ex-gamblers, so used to the highs and lows of active addiction. Many people can enjoy gambling without it becoming a problem, but over time, some people develop a gambling addiction that can ruin their lives. Compulsive gambling is a progressive illness, so even if you've gambled before and been okay, a problem could develop later on. The urge to gamble can be overwhelming, leading someone to.
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Each of these women have come through their experiences with lessons learned – lessons that can help us all as we navigate this crazy thing called life.
Today we share Ashley's story of overcoming gambling addiction.
Trigger warning: Suicidal ideation.
TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF
Hi! My name is Ashley Marie. I am thirty-seven years old.
I live in a small town in Arkansas, where I have lived my whole life.
I have three living kids that are my world, one angel baby, and a step-son. I am newly married to the love of my life.
Currently I am waiting to get accepted in to the LPN program while taking basics for RN at my local college.
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I am new to the blogging world, though I have always had a passion for writing. My blog is mostly personal, but I am trying to narrow down my niche to provide more value to my reader and support my family.
I would love for you to check out my blog at Her Heart Out Loud.
HOW DOES YOUR STORY BEGIN?
My first marriage was neither good nor easy. I suffered from a ton of abuse of all forms and was constantly put down.
But I stayed in there by being focused on my kids. Doing things for them and with them made me happy. I did not believe in divorce and I swore I would never put my kids through all that came with the end of a marriage.
However, in 2015 it became almost unbearable.
He started dragging my kids into our fights and would be cruel to them.
As a result, they wanted to be at home less and less. They started spending most of their time with family and friends, which I could understand as I for sure did not want to be there!
I started looking for ways to not be home as well.
What started out as a simple girl's night out turned into a big problem.
WHEN DID YOUR GAMBLING PROBLEM BEGIN?
I can remember how it all started. From time to time, that day still haunts me.
I went to the casino with a friend. I took forty dollars with me and played until it was gone.
After then, I went and sat in the dining area and read a book until she was ready to go.
However, she ended up winning a nice sum of money.
I remember thinking how that would be nice. I could sure use the money! So a few days later, after my now ex-husband and I had been fighting all day, I decided I had had enough and I was going to go back to the casino and try to win.
I took one-hundred dollars and away I went.
I honestly can't tell you if I won that day or not. What I do remember is that I forgot all my troubles while I was there. I didn't stress about things at home and for me that was huge.
At this point gambling became my escape.
If my kids weren't home, I was at the casino.
Then it came to the point I was at the casino no matter if they were home or not.
WHEN DID YOU REALIZE YOU HAD A PROBLEM?
Six months in I started thinking maybe I had a problem, but still tried to convince myself that I was in control.
How To Quit Gambling Addiction
I got paid on Friday, left work, and went straight to the casino. I lost my whole pay check that day in a matter of about thirty minutes.
I cried all the way home.
Then I called the 1-800 number on the back of my casino rewards card (if you feel you have a problem they offer advice, put you on a list and are suppose to kick you out when they see you – but they don't).
This same thing happened for the next several weeks.
All too soon I was broke, all my bills were due and my kids needed things. Still all I could think about was ways to get money to go to the casino.
I called an agency about trying to get counseling, but my insurance would not cover it. I did not have the money to get the help I truly needed.
A friend of mine was a counselor. I talked to her a little, but because she was my friend, I found myself not being completely honest. She could not help me when I was lying to her and not doing what she told me to do.
I found myself lying to loved ones so they would let me borrow money.
Once I was borrowed out, I started asking strangers for money. I was amazed at how many people at the casino gave it to me.
One guy was going to give me money to sleep with him.
Thank God, I never did anything like that.
WHEN DID YOU REACH BOTTOM?
Because of gambling I lost my car and a ton of friends and family, had my utilities turned off, and destroyed my relationship with my kids.
I often found myself googling ways to kill myself. I believe the search was 'how to quickly and painlessly end your life.'
I wanted to die; I felt I deserved to die, but I was too big of a chicken to do it. I just couldn't pull the trigger or swallow the pills.
I kept thinking how bad it would hurt and that my kids had been through enough. They didn't deserve to live without a mom. Their dad was terrible – who would take care of them if I was gone?
A year in my sister and mom started trying to help me.
I can remember yelling at them, tell them to mind their own business and just ignore them all together. But thankfully my mom, sister and kids never gave up on me.
In 2016 my marriage ended very badly.
I knew that if I didn't get help I was going to lose my kids.
I turned to the few people I had left in my life and the journey began.
It was the most challenging thing I have ever done, and took much longer than I ever would have imagined.
In January 2018, I met the man of my dreams. Telling him about my addiction was hard but I knew he had to know if he was going to be in my life.
Then in February, I told myself it was going to be the last time I went to the casino. However, I had said that before, so I didn't even believe myself.
My mom took over my bills: I set my check up to go direct deposit and gave her the only card I had.
My sister would come by my work and home to make sure I was there. Both her and mom called me several times a day at random times.
Once, I snuck over to the casino and I didn't answer the calls when they came through so they knew where I was. They called the casino to see if I was there, and then headed over to get me.
Thanks to my mom, my sister, and my new husband, I am where I am today.
I have the best support group ever. Are there times I still want to go? Yes! People talk about it in front of me or invite me to go with them and it is hard to say no but I must.
I cannot let my loved ones down.
I can't let myself down.
WHAT ADVICE WOULD YOU GIVE TO SOMEONE WHO THINKS THEY, OR A FRIEND OR FAMILY MEMBER, MAY HAVE A GAMBLING PROBLEM?
My advice to anyone facing addiction would be turn to the people you know will never turn their back on you.
You need to get help at the first sign of a problem.
The longer you wait the harder it is to stop.
Look at your kids! Look in the mirror! Is this the life you want; is this the life they deserve?
Dig deep and find the willpower inside of you to take control of your life.
To the loved ones of the addict, don't give up on them. Ever!
They will be mean to you and they will push you away. The addiction will make them do and say horrible things.
Don't turn your back on them.
If my family would have turned their back on me I would either be broke, still battling addiction, or dead.
Concluding my story of overcoming gambling addiction
Addiction can happen to anyone.
Judgement is not the answer; helping each other is.
How To Beat Gambling Addiction
I never thought it could happen to me.
No one wakes up and says, 'I think I will become an addict today.'
That's why I wanted to share my gambling addiction story so you can see how easily it happens.
Please never be afraid to ask for help. Please never turn your back on someone asking for help.
Need help? Call the National Problem Gambling Helpline: 1-800-522-4700.
Want greater connection in your relationship?
Then you'll want this freebie.It's called the KISS connection and it's a FREE 4 step everyday practice that will bring back that loving feeling.
Hit the pink button to get your free copy today.
This lesson addresses two issues—gambling and addiction to gambling. It also relates those issues to your relationships with God and the people you love.
A Christian in Arizona tells about her husband's experience:
'My husband worked with a man in Oregon who spent each evening after work playing slot machines in a bar. He not only was obsessed with the hope of winning, he became so mesmerized while he was playing that he could shut out all thoughts of family responsibility. After that, his shame would trigger the next episode as he hoped to win back his heavy losses.
'My husband tried to pull this man from the bar several times, as he knew that on pay day the man would often spend his entire paycheck. Then he would go home and face his family in fear and anguish. This never stopped him though; he continued and borrowed money from my husband and many others until he was so in debt he didn't know where to turn.
'In the end the debt consumed him and devastated his family and friends. At that point, the man could take no more and shot himself in the head to end it all. It was terribly sad. After his death my husband felt much guilt too. He wondered if he could have done more to help his friend. This is an example of typical collateral damage. Addictions and suicides lay a guilt trip and many other psychological burdens on the loved ones.'
What Does the Bible Say About Gambling?
In this lesson we will address the gambling-related problems that are obvious, like spending the grocery money and becoming addicted to gambling. But first, what is wrong in principle with gambling?
The fundamental issue is this: When one person wins money, it's because other people lost money. Hoping to win means you are hoping that others will lose. Not just lose a contest or a prize—lose their money so you can win their money! In a casino, you may think in terms of the casino losing the money. But where does the casino get its money? From all the many disappointed people who lost their money—many of whom are poor and gamble in desperation, clinging to the fantasy of 'rags to riches.' Gambling is never win-win. It is win-lose-lose-lose-lose.
This is contrary to God's great commandment to love your neighbor. After all, 'Love does no harm to a neighbor' (Romans 13:10). We're also instructed, 'Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep' (Romans 12:15). God wants us to have true empathy for others! In gambling, you feel like rejoicing only when others feel like weeping, and vice versa. We're told, 'Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others' (Philippians 2:4). You'll be helping other people and helping society when you don't support the gambling industry.
Is the prevalence of gambling exploding?
2 Timothy 3:1-2, 4
In the last days perilous times will come: For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money.lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God.
The mushrooming mania for gambling, especially in Western nations, is one major example of this prophecy being fulfilled. Only 50 years ago, most Christian Americans thought of all gambling as being evil. The gamblers went to Nevada and New Jersey. But many things have changed. Today, most people don't read the Bible, know much of what it says or pay much attention to the Ten Commandments. Governments have legitimized gambling with state-run lotteries and other forms of legalized gambling. And people tend to think that if something is legal, it is mora—which often is not true.
With the boom in betting comes the corrupting consequences: deep indebtedness, depression, despair, broken homes, criminal behavior, suicides and many other tragic repercussions that affect individuals, their families and society.
Will a large number of gamblers become addicted to gambling?
John 8:34
Jesus answered them, 'Most assuredly, I say to you, whoever commits sin is a slave of sin.'
Just look at the statistics. A large percentage of gamblers are already addicted. Many would not admit it, because they are in denial. A gambler may admit to having 'a few problems' with it—like spending too much money, getting deeper into debt and spending too much time away from family—but it may take a major crisis ('hitting bottom') before he or she admits to being a problem gambler, a compulsive gambler or an addicted gambler—enslaved to gambling.
John 8:32
And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.
Chrome offline installer latest version 2019. We are creatures of habit. The more we do anything, the more it becomes routine. One bad habit leads to others, and a bad habit often becomes a psychological addiction, which is enslavement. God wants you to be free from bad habits and addictions.
It's easy to see why gambling is addictive. A win is a thrill that whets the appetite for more. A loss is often followed by more playing in hopes of recouping the loss. And, for many, it is escapism from reality and responsibility. (The 'Related Resources' listed below offer valuable guidance in dealing with addictions.)
How does gambling relate to the Tenth Commandment against coveting?
Exodus 20:17
'You shall not covet your neighbor's house; you shall not covet your neighbor's wife, nor his male servant, nor his female servant, nor his ox, nor his donkey, nor anything that is your neighbor's.'
Covet means desire, but it implies a wrong kind of desire, like greed. When you gamble, you are coveting your 'neighbor's' money. You are not earning the money or offering goods or services in exchange for his (or her) money. You want his money while offering nothing in return. Therefore, your desire for his money is coveting.
And Paul said that covetousness is idolatry (Colossians 3:5; see also Ephesians 5:5). Why? Because it is a desire that is stronger than your desire to love God and put Him first in your life.
What does the Bible teach about materialism?
1 Timothy 6:9-10
But those who desire to be rich fall into temptation and a snare, and into many foolish and harmful lusts which drown men in destruction and perdition. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil, for which some have strayed from the faith in their greediness, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows.
Materialism—the love of money and the things money can buy—is related to coveting, and as this scripture shows, it is often self-destructive. Someone is materialistic when money and physical things have become more important than relationships and spiritual values. The Bible says, 'How much better to get wisdom than gold!' (Proverbs 16:16). And being materialistic can cause you to lose out on the most valuable thing of all—eternal life! Jesus said, 'Children, how hard it is for those who trust in riches to enter the kingdom of God!' (Mark 10:24).
How does the biblical definition of love relate to gambling?
1 John 3:16-17
By this we know love, because He laid down His life for us. And we also ought to lay down our lives for the brethren. But whoever has this world's goods, and sees his brother in need, and shuts up his heart from him, how does the love of God abide in him?
Love can be defined as 'the give way' rather than 'the get way.' God is the greatest giver: 'He gives to all life, breath, and all things' (Acts 17:25). He is the source of 'every good gift and every perfect gift' (James 1:17). Therefore, God wants us to follow His example and live a life of giving. Use your time, talents and energy to give to others. Gambling, however, is focused on get, not give.
How is gambling contrary to the biblical work ethic?
Proverbs 13:11 (New Living Translation)
Wealth from get-rich-quick schemes quickly disappears; wealth from hard work grows.
This verse is contrasting all 'get-rich-quick' schemes, including gambling, with honestly earning an income. Consider also: 'A greedy person tries to get rich quick, but it only leads to poverty' (Proverbs 28:22, New Living Translation). Money gotten quickly usually disappears quickly.
The Bible repeatedly praises hard work as noble and a key to success. See Proverbs 10:4; 12:11; 21:5; 28:19-20. Spend your time productively, such as in getting an education, working and serving others.
How should parents teach their children about important issues of life, including gambling?
Deuteronomy 6:7
You shall teach [God's ways] diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up.
God encourages parents to make teaching an everyday part of life. This includes discussing good and bad examples from the news, from entertainment and from personal experiences.
Tragically, real-life examples probably won't be hard to find. Some researchers consider gambling the fastest-growing teenage addiction. The youth of America today have never seen life without legalized gambling, which makes it seem acceptable. Bovada locked funds. Eventually many of them will be tempted and pressured by their peers to gamble.
So what can we do to steer them in the right direction? Children need good role models. If adults don't practice what they preach, their words will do little good. If we don't want our children to be gamblers, then we must set the example. Then all during their growing up years, we need to thoroughly teach them what is wrong with gambling (and the typical sleazy culture of casinos) and teach all the right things they need to do with their lives.
What about private gambling and gambling when losses are limited to a few dollars?
Luke 16:10-11
He who is faithful in what is least is faithful also in much; and he who is unjust in what is least is unjust also in much. Therefore if you have not been faithful in the unrighteous mammon, who will commit to your trust the true riches?
Here are two common questions: What about putting a few quarters in a slot machine 'for the fun of it'? And what about a private game among friends when the maximum amount anyone can lose is very small? Aren't these harmless exceptions?
First, remember how addicting gambling is. Big habits generally begin with small steps.
Second, these are matters of personal conscience. There are differences of opinion among people of godly character. But we encourage you to think in terms of principle. Going back to the previous section, what if you had a son or daughter watching you? Wouldn't your example make it more difficult to convince him or her of the evils of gambling? Why not just play for poker chips, match sticks or a high score? With all decisions that we face, let's ask ourselves, 'What would Jesus choose to do?'
How can I get the strength I need to overcome my gambling addiction?
John 16:24
Until now you have asked nothing in My name. Ask, and you will receive, that your joy may be full.
Philippians 4:13
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
2 Timothy 1:7
For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.
First, you must come to the point where you fully acknowledge that you have a progressive addiction, and therefore you must stop all gambling and permanently abstain from it. If you go back to it, your compulsive behavior will start back as strong as ever.
How To Beat A Gambling Addiction
Then turn your life over to God. The Bible reminds us over and over to rely on God by reading the Bible, praying and even fasting for His help and strength. Be aware that one of the keys to answered prayer is obedience to God's commandments (1 John 3:22). Those who repent and are baptized can receive the Holy Spirit by which God strengthens us. And remember that no matter how many times you slip up, whenever you are sincerely sorry, ask for God's forgiveness and recommit to avoiding the sin, He will always forgive (1 John 1:9).
The Bible also teaches us to reach out to others for help (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12). Two people can be much stronger than one alone. Take advantage of all the resources and supports available to you—factual information, professional counseling, your minister, godly friends and support groups. (Gamblers Anonymous gives excellent support and doesn't cost anything.) And ask others to pray for you (James 5:16).
Once you are in control of your life, you will experience real peace and joy. May God guide and bless you as you pursue recovery.
Apply Now
Visit the Gamblers Anonymous Web site. Even if gambling is not a problem for you, you will find this list of 20 questions quite interesting and informative. The more times that a person answers 'yes' to these questions, the more likely he or she is a compulsive gambler or has a gambling problem. If nothing else, this knowledge may help you to help someone else.
How To Beat Gambling Addiction
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